“Everyone else diets - so why can’t I?

“Everyone else diets — so why can’t I?”

This is something I hear a lot in recovery.
Everyone seems to be dieting.
Everyone’s hitting the gym.
Skipping meals. Talking about “clean eating.”

So, if that’s what’s normal... why are you being told to stop?

When clients bring this up, I hear the frustration behind it.

It’s frustrating to feel like you’re being told to give something up — especially when it looks like the rest of the world is doing it without consequences.
It can feel unfair. It can feel like you’re losing control. It can feel like recovery is asking you to go against everything that feels normal or accepted.

And that frustration? Totally valid.

We’re constantly surrounded by messages about the “right” way to eat, the “ideal” body, or the next big health trend — whether it’s a new food to avoid, a supplement to take, or the latest medication that promises weight loss.

Diet culture is loud. And relentless.

But here’s the thing:
Just because something is common doesn’t mean it’s healthy — or helpful.
Not everyone who diets has an eating disorder, but when these behaviors start impacting your mental health, your relationships, or your quality of life... that’s when they become a problem.

So if your treatment team is asking you to pause or change certain habits, there’s a reason.
Maybe those habits have become rigid. Maybe you’re stuck in a cycle of restriction and bingeing.
Or maybe the constant focus on food and your body is crowding out joy, connection, and peace.

Whatever the specifics — these behaviors probably aren’t giving you what you hoped they would.

So yeah, your recovery might not look like what your friends or coworkers are doing.
And yes — that’s really hard.
It takes a lot of courage to push back against a culture that’s always telling you to shrink yourself to be more “enough.”

When someone says, “But everyone else is doing it — why can’t I?” — here’s how I usually respond:

That’s a great question. And only you can really answer it.

Take a step back and ask:

Is this the life I want to keep living long-term?
Is this truly making me feel better — or just stuck?
What might open up if I let go of some of these rules?

Change is hard — and scary — and it definitely doesn’t happen overnight.
But you don’t have to figure it all out on your own.

If any part of this resonates with you — or if you’re just feeling unsure about what recovery might look like — I’m here to talk. No pressure. No judgment. Just support, wherever you’re at.

Feel free to reach out. You don’t have to do this alone.